Dinner and a Show: Five Guys and "Observe and Report"

Dinner…

Five Guys

44650 Waxpool Road

Ashburn, VA 20147

www.fiveguys.com

Maybe you’ve driven by and thought you’d try it out sometime. Maybe you’ve been there and are just waiting for the right occasion to try it again. Don’t hesitate—your mouth will thank you.

Just when you think that there’s nothing new to be done with hamburgers and hot dogs, Five Guys reminds you that sometimes fresh ingredients cooked just right is all you need. Now a nationwide chain, Five Guys is native to Northern Virginia, having been founded in Arlington in the 1980s. It has slowly expanded geographically since although customer loyalty has been consistent.

Burgers are still their mainstay. A regular burger has two patties and the little burger has one. Either can be ordered with cheese and bacon—all other toppings are offered free. A bacon cheeseburger with mushrooms is a great way to fill up on a budget. While I won’t say that a Five Guys burger is the right menu for a diet, I have been assured that they contain no trans-fats so we can call it even.

Take my advice and do not leave without the fries. Fresh from Idaho, thick cut and served in a cup that always overflows into the bag, these French fries are a little bit of heaven. They’re cooked in peanut oil and are worth the trip alone (try the Cajun style too.)

Five guys isn’t over decorated, but it still maintains a welcoming sense of charm. Maybe it’s the red and white checkers that serves as the company marker. Maybe it’s just that the food is too good to take notice.

Price Range: $4-6

And A Show…

Observe and Report (R)

Summary: A mall security manager with delusions of grandeur (Seth Rogan) strives for love and respect while pursuing a masked burglar and an unmasked serial flasher.

Review:

At what point did Seth Rogan start appearing in every movie ever made?

It’s not that I’m complaining. Both Rogan and Anna Faris are both generally good for a laugh when they have a halfway decent script. It seems to be tied to a mutual willingness to pursue their acting challenges without pride or self esteem.

Unfortunately, awkward silences and self-destructive tendencies is not enough to save “Observe and Report.” Despite a dearth of comedic talent, there is not a single laugh in the entire film. It’s two hours of your life that you will spend shifting uncomfortably and wondering if it really would be rude to make a phone call in the theater.

“Observe and Report” describes itself as a black comedy. That might be the problem. Rather than playing the events of the story for comedy, the movie focuses too much on the main character’s overly unfortunate life. His alcoholic mother, power mad dreams and desire to be a real police officer might have been funny, but were instead just awkward and sad.

On a side note, while I do feel that there is room for R-rated comedies, this one could have shaved away the language, drug use, unfortunate nudity and minor violence. It couldn’t have hurt the movie. Honestly, it could only have helped.

If you don’t trust me, that’s fine. Go see the movie. However, I’ll beat myself repeatedly in the forehead with a brick before I watch “Observe and Report” again.

Rating (1-5): ½ of 5

John Geddie probably couldn’t pass the police interview either.

Next Week: “State of Play”